what am I reflecting?

That idea of being made more and more like Jesus; of being changed into his glorious image; has got me thinking again. I used 2 Corinthians 3:18 in my last post but have to unpack it more. Here is the New Living Translation:

"So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord - who is the Spirit - makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image." 

At times I wonder though...

Does it count when I'm losing my mind managing kids and household 24/7 while hubby is away? Does it count when I am calling my kids "psycho" under my breath? Does it count when I don't model Christlike behavior? Does it count when I neglect to pray, knowing full well the power of prayer? Does it count when I let my limited view mar relationships, forgetful of God's incessant work in each of us? Does it count when I know I'm just getting by when I could be thriving? 

I can hear the, "It's okay. Give yourself grace. You're doing the best you can. Don't beat yourself up. At least you're keeping everyone alive and well." 

That's all nice and fluffy encouragement, but I'd prefer something deeper, please. 

Second Corinthians 3:18 teaches me that after salvation I can look at my Bible, read (or hear) its content, and actually reflect the glory of the Lord in my life. Just as good or better than the most spectacular sunset after a perfect day. It's mesmerizing to gaze at one of those gloriously painted skies, so it is possible in me. My life can be a reflection of something glorious. It can't be manufactured, forced, generated by good habits or choices apart from Christ, but by simply looking at and contemplating the written Word, allowing the Spirit within to teach and guide little by little, day by day. And therein lies the change. It's often subtle, sometimes surprising, but with patient endurance, trusting that he's doing a good work in me even in my failures and definitely in my shortcomings, others can look back with me and see growth and grace. 

What do you want to reflect?